


Post Finals Shenanigans

by wittykitsune



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Human/Troll Society, Alternate Universe - No Sburb/Sgrub Sessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-08
Updated: 2015-05-08
Packaged: 2018-03-29 14:38:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3899959
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wittykitsune/pseuds/wittykitsune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave and John have finally finished their last finals and decide to go out to eat to relax and celebrate. Dave finds more about this trip appealing than he bargained for and shenanigans ensue.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Post Finals Shenanigans

**Author's Note:**

> Quick drabble based on this post on tumblr: http://nubbybub.tumblr.com/post/118379319324/ok-but-modern-au-where-dave-and-john-are-college.

Saturday finals were the worst, the very fucking worst, but at least they wrapped up before lunch. Who’d even decided that having them wrap up on Saturday morning was legal? But that’s what happened to one John Egbert and Dave Strider and now that it was over they both had a craving for double cheeseburgers and cokes. They had decided to get their fix from the diner just off campus that was made of old subway cars. There wasn’t even a proper subway anywhere in this college town but the owner had had some transported and repurposed. There was even a proper jukebox on your left on the way in to add to the old feel of the inside.

They glanced over the musical offerings together before Dave steered John away from it. There was only so many times he could allow himself to be subject to John’s musical taste in a 48 hour period and considering he’d gotten to pick the study music last night, Dave had had his fill and more. It was the lunch rush and someone from behind the counter came and took their drink orders before they could even sit down. By the time they were seated they received drinks at the table before their butts had barely touched the seats.

They both pulled a menu from the holder on the table and looked over the offerings. They knew what they’d come here to get but it was always worth a look to see what else there might be, that and the burger toppings had their own little colored square to look at.

Dave was still looking at the menu and just taking a drink when their waiter came over.

“What can I get the two of you today?” His voice was a little too loud even with the music going and the way he set his teeth into that smile was obviously forced. His nametag said Karkat and his smile might have been forced, but between those round cheeks and pointed ears and bright eyes he’d be someone’s taste just seeing his face, that someone being Dave.

Dave coughed and thumped his chest some with his fist when his coke went down wrong and he felt heat start building on his face.  

“Dave, are you alright?”

“Fine, John. Just order while I try not to drown.” Dave cleared his throat quietly and tried not to look at Karkat.

“Oh right, I’ll have a double cheeseburger with lettuce and grilled onions please, Karkat.”  John said. He looked over at Dave expectantly and it took him a moment to realize what John was looking at him for.

It was worse when Karkat cleared his throat and he spotted he was looking at him too. “Right right, fuck. I’ll have the cheese, double, burger, I mean burger, double cheeseburger and a chocolate shake. Please.” Dave hoped he didn’t get caught staring at the lines of annoyance on Karkat’s forehead or the little horns on his head. While he watched him write it down.

“Anything _on_ it?” Karkat said, a soft clicking starting in his throat.

“On it?”

“Your burger, Dave.” John said, pointing at the menu. “He wants to know what you want on your burger. What’s wrong with you? Cat got your tongue?”

Dave was wishing a Karkat had his tongue but this was not the time to be letting that shit slip and he bit his tongue instead before speaking up. “Cheese.”   

“Cheese? You want _cheese_ on the cheeseburger? Are you f…?” Karkat’s voice rose at the second question but he stopped when he say John looking at him. “Sorry, I mean nothing. We can do double cheese if you want. No problem, sir.”

“Oh shit, no. I didn’t mean that. I meant y-, bacon. Not cheese, bacon. Please.” Dave tried to laugh it off and John snickered even if Karkat didn’t look amused. He looked like Dave had thrown his coke in his face.

“Fine,” he said, “two double cheeseburgers, one with onions and lettuce, one with bacon, and a chocolate shake. I’ll be back with your order.” Karkat turned on the spot and walked off.

Dave couldn’t help watching after him. He looked over the cute round shoulders in the red and white checkered button down shirt and the nice round ass in the black slacks. Even the way his legs moved with such power and purpose as he half stomped off.

“Dave?” John backed off when his poke to the shoulder made him jump.

“What? Shit, what?” Dave felt the heat only grow on his face and neck and ears and he hoped his shades kept it hidden. He clenched his brown hands in his lap.

“What is wrong with you? You’re jumpy and out of it. You could hardly order without drowning yourself in your coke. Did finals get you that bad? I thought you said it was an easy one.” John’s brows  were raised and he rested a sandy brown cheek on his hand.

“It isn’t the test, dude.” Dave said firmly.

“No? Thought I had it. What is it then? If you don’t tell me I’ll just have to guess.”

“Shut it, these lips are sealed and it’ll take more than your flexing arms to pry them open. Tell me about that movie you want to go see.”

“Oh no, Dave. You aren’t getting out of this that easy. I know I’ve seen these kinds of reactions before. I’m going to figure it out.”

“Nah you won’t, this is something beyond you.” Dave leaned back against his seat. ‘Thankfully.’ He thought. He tried to steady his hands on his glass and settle back down. He thought he did too, at least until the food came.

Karkat was back with a tray with two plates and a milkshake glass. John’s plate was set down just fine, Dave’s that followed was in place just as easily. The trouble hit when Karkat went to set down the milkshake, Dave reached to take it from him. His fingers touched Karkat’s warm soft ones and suddenly no one was holding a falling shake.

“Oh fuck.” Karkat managed to catch the glass’s base in time to right it on the table and keep it out of Dave’s lap, but not enough to keep it from spilling some, half the whipped cream, and the cherry onto the table and Karkat’s other hand that was gripping the rim. “What the hell are you going?”

“I...” Dave laughed in a slightly higher pitch than he ever wanted to do and it only made Karkat’s glare get that much more intense. He’d started to sink into the seat when John leapt up.

“Aha! You think he’s cute Dave, holy shit I figured it out!” John had jumped up so hard and suddenly the plates rattled.

The finger pointing of the accusation coupled with his cold sticky hand and everything else about this moment was just too much for Karkat. He looked at Dave, expecting him to correct his friend but was instead greeted with said seat occupant trying to slide down enough to hide his blush under the table. Karkat felt his own face and ears begin burning to match and he looked away.

John’s laughing made the moment that much worse and Dave had almost completed his objective when Karkat slammed his palms on the table. “Will you fucking stop it? The both of you carrying on like this in an eating establishment. Just who do you think you are? If I had any-”

“Karkat!” Karkat stopped and his shoulders hunched when he realized he’d both been yelling and also making a scene. “You get back in the kitchen right now.”

“Yes, sir.” His voice was much lower and he grabbed the tray he’d dropped and headed away from the table.

“What the hell did you think you were doing, Vantas?” That was all whole place caught before the door mostly muffled the yelling and another server came and cleared their table up and brought Dave a fresh shake.

The source of the voice soon came out and to their table. “I’m sorry to both of you gentlemen. Consider lunch on the house for my employee’s awful behavior. Don’t worry he’s been dealt with.”

“But,” Dave began.

“No need to thank me. Enjoy your meals.” The manager walked off and left them to the rest of their food. Dave only ate in a hurry to get out of their, barely even tasting it.

“I can’t take you anywhere, John.” Dave said once they were outside in the sunshine again. “I cannot believe what you did in there. In what world did that seem like a good idea, man?”

“But you did, Dave. You thought he was cute and I figured it out. I noticed.”

“Yeah you and two thirds of this whole damn state. I’m not mad you blew any chance I have of ever talking to that guy, I’m more pissed you made a bad scene worse.”

“Jeez Dave, I’m sorry. Do you think we should go back and see if we can apologize?”

“You’re damn right there should be some apologizing.” Both of them jumped and turned to find the speaker, the very person John was talking about, sans nametag but still in uniform. “What the hell were you thinking pointing something like that out? God I thought my friends had issues keeping their fucking traps shut about things.”  

“Oh hey, were you waiting on us? Well you see, you’d understand if you knew he wouldn’t just tell.” John smiled sheepishly and rubbed the back of his head with a hand.

“Bullshit. That’s three times the reason plus two to keep it to yourself at the very place it would be worst to say it. Have some manners and decency. Now go, leave me to have a talk with mister coolkid mole here. I want to have some words about why he was trying to burrow under the table.” Karkat put his hands on his hips.

“But I already s-”

“John, please. You’re my best bro but you keep this up and you’re gonna make an enemy for life and maybe find yourself pushed into traffic here and now.”

“Oh, OH, oh shit. Sorry Dave. I’ll see you back in the dorms. Sorry Karkat, didn’t mean to cause a scene. Hope that this doesn’t mean you’re fired.”

“Psh, I didn’t like that job anyway.” Karkat looked away. “Get out of here before I help him push you out in the road.”

“Aha, yeah later.” John said and was out of sight before Karkat looked at Dave again.

“So, I’m cute am I, or is your friend full of shit.”

“Both, I mean he’s absolutely full of shit but I did feel my mouth start filling full of who knows what the moment I saw you.”

“Coke? Or was that your lungs? I have half a fucking mind to just tell you to buzz off and forget your puppy crush but fortunately for you I’ve now got a lot more free time on my fucking hands and I’m willing to see if you’d be a decent way to fill it.”

“Woah wait really? You’re going to do that for stumbling bumbling lost you your job me?”

Karkat sighed and shook his head. “Yeah, why the hell not? That is on one condition.”

“Name it, it’s yours.” Dave grinned at him.

“Treat me to a movie?”

“Deal, I’ll buy you one of everything from the snack bar if I can have a fresh start.”

“No, I’m afraid you have to live with today, Dave. I don’t want to forget that anytime soon.”

“Shit, what about for a double feature?” Dave laughed.

“Hm, ask me again if we get through this and I want to see you again. I might, or it may just become _our_  moment.” Karkat elbowed him lightly as they headed down the sidewalk, his hand loosely taking Dave’s.  

“You drive a hard bargain, Karkat.” He gave his hand a squeeze.

  
  
  


 

 

 

 


End file.
